Last night something happened to me—I had a dream within a dream! Inception style! Here’s how it went down: I was dreaming that I had to unload a bunch of guitars from my car, and I was worried because I thought it was too hot outside and the guitars would get damaged. But when I went outside, there was snow everywhere! I wandered through the piles of snow and found my car buried. I remember looking down and I was walking on clear ice, and I could see little fish swimming around under there. I finally got into my car and I was freezing, but I still checked out the guitars to see if everything is cool. Suddenly, the ice started to melt extremely fast, and before long, I was floating in water! Right then, I started thinking about this one particular guitar because I thought it would make a good paddle.
Then, in the dream, I “awoke” and realized I was back in my bedroom, and it was all just a dream. The kicker is that I was still dreaming, because that “paddle” guitar was suddenly in my hands—then I woke up for real! How about that misadventure?
The next day (in real life), I went down to the basement to find this weird old bugger that, in my dream, would’ve made a good paddle. Apparently, this pancake-batter-shaped Steelphon is one of only a few known to exist, and I had forgotten that I still had it! Hailing from the mid ’60s, this Italian-made electric is a true oddity. Steelphon, which is an odd name in and of itself, was a company based in Turin, Italy, that was already making guitar-related items, primarily amps, but of course jumped into electric guitars during the boom years. The company seemed to contract out guitar production, because this one has all the characteristics of a Crucianelli-made guitar: the robust truss rod, the mini humbuckers, and the amazing bridge (which is like a steel brick) that would put any Gibson bridge to shame.
The amazing mini humbuckers are hot as hell and sound phenomenal—probably my all-time favorite pickups. The electronics feature a preset tone selector, pickup selector knob, and volume and tone knobbies. Playability is obviously weird because the body is so darn wide, and a little heavy. Plus, the neck is slightly thin so the whole experience is a little wonky. But again, the guitar sounds so good that it could be worth it for those looking for the “odd” factor.
“This pancake-batter-shaped Steelphon is one of only a few known to exist, and I had forgotten that I still had it!”
Back in the day, I coveted this guitar for a long time. There was a fellow in the Netherlands who collected and sold the strangest guitars, and this was on his site forever. Eventually, I ended up buying this and a few others from him, but when I got this guitar, it was a basket case. Playability was awful, the electronics were a mess, and the fret dots seemed to have been repaired by a kindergartener. The Steelphon also suffered from the dreaded Italian finish-shrinkage, which caused the guitar to have a lot of finish checking and splitting, kind of like a candy-coated finish that got cracked.
All in all, we were able to sort everything out, and now the guitar plays rather well. A hallmark of many guitars from the ’60s is that the electronics were overly complicated. Designers back in the day were trying to get a lot of preset tonal options, but the overall sound was always getting muddied. Once you dive in under the pickguard, it’s always best to wire point-to-point to get the best sounding guitar—especially with these pickups, which are just so aggressive. They sound dreamy!
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